Chairman’s Business Networking Blog, Thursday 19th June 2014.
18 present in all including Vivienne Nwalema from the Billericay meeting.
Pride of place regarding apologies for absence goes to Peter Hood, hopefully by the time this Blog is published his wife will have given birth.
Howard Bullock is currently heading the Performance League; no sooner was it announced he took up his station at the end of the room to deliver the Ed Slot. He extolled the value of literature and literary quotes that should hold us in good stead as we look to develop our businesses. Clearly the Bullock childhood was replete with comics, as his turned his attention to Viz Magazine for inspirational quotes. Number one is to put your shoes on before you tread on anything sharp which seemed to have universal appeal. Whilst it did not reach the dizzy heights of Alan Shaw’s “brick in the systern” suggestion it had us all awake for the 60 second round.
Quote of the round goes to Michael Adelizzi “…as people get older they tend to want wet rooms…” what you really mean Michael is that as you get older you make more rooms wet but nonetheless it’s an interesting thought.
We lack a gardener of any description in the group but this was very much made up for by Marcelle Saad talking about 122 blue carrots. I think that was right!!, my note taking isn’t always at its best at 7.30 am in the morning.
The prize for the most bizarre and off the wall offering was a close run thing.
Alan Shaw visited his brother in Dorset, viewed the plans for an extension that his brother and his wife proudly presented to him and proceeded to send them alternative sketches and plans once he was safely in his own home, thereby insuring he won’t have to visit his brother for another 10 years.
Pride of place however must go to Allan Moller; he gave a fantastic demonstration of how to persuade a DIY enthusiast out of his obsession. His was an explanation of how he fixed a shower that had previously been fitted by the owner of the house that gave an electric shock when turned on. He took us through all of the steps that he took in order to ensure there was a safe well installed shower. I didn’t understand a word of it, I doubt whether anybody else did, but we all know never to mess with a shower and get Alan in… job done!
Richard Reed produces a really good offer of some 5 star hotels in some wonderful part of the world for several days at only £500.00 per head. Unfortunately the offer has passed and it was simply illustrative of the tactics Richard uses to get up his wife’s nose, still…we can all perhaps learn from each other’s marital tactical manoeuvring. My ploy was to completely mess up 3 applications for a passport for my wife that still remains unresolved. We could have been lying on a beach of golden sands under the hot blazing sun but for my inability to fill in forms… that got up her nose to !!!! Please let me have any particular way that you have managed as individuals to irritate your spouse recently.
By the time you read this Blog you will know that England have virtually no chance of getting out of the group stages of the World Cup, therefore Stuart Smallcombe’s promise that a Sony 4K would produce really high resolution television picture (4 times the current high definition TV’s ) means that sometime in the future you would be able to see exactly, in the most intimate detail, the hairs on Wayne Rooney’s head and the exact part of the Louis Suarez neck that you would need to hit to break it.
Modesty almost persuaded me not to mention that I won the Oscar, indeed I only mention it in order to emphasise Jenni Pritchard’s intelligent and appreciation of anything to do with toilet humour.
Danielle White, standing in for Kim Redwood-Lee this week, reminded us that Kim is about to test wind and limb in the Sahara. We wish her well.
Talking if Danielle, she produced her first 10 minute presentation and very good it was to. Highlights of her exceedingly high-tech presentation, was a picture of Jesus apparently illustrating how they dealt with book keeping in 4000BC. I am still puzzling over that one, but she gave an interesting slant on Redwood Clarke bookkeeping in general and was rewarded with a host of questions. I understand Brian Painter is organising a petition for her to substitute for Kim every week…well done Danielle.
If not spectacular it was a good referrals round and with the sun streaming through the windows and a beautiful day in prospect, everything was well with the world.
Until next week…