Chairman’s Blog Meeting 13th June 2013
25 Members present and once again a very lively and positive meeting.
The positive tone apparent from the very outset when Tina rose to her feet with the rest of the Leadership team without a mouthful of breakfast…so now we know what she really does!
Paul Booth was standing in for David Plumley and delivered an impromptu Ed Slot.
It made a change that Paul Booth was not declared the leader of the Performance League. After his array of referrals last week Mike Rogers is the current leader.
And then before we knew it, we were into the 60 second round!
Mike Rogers delivered his 60 seconds from the comfort and convenience of his chair having earlier put his back out picking up the bells he uses in timing the 60 seconds.
At a meeting where Tina did not have a mouthful when she stood up to speak, Jason did. The profuseness of his apologies delivered with his hand politely covering his mouth left him about 30 seconds for his presentation.
Stewart Roberts gave us part 2 of what you need to be fantastic in business. You will have to refer to last week’s Blog to check what the first three were. The last four require you to be an ambassador, a performer, a learner and last but apparently most importantly, you have to have that spark, you have to feel alive inside. He readily acknowledged when he arrived at the checkin this morning that he felt as if he had just got out of bed. That of course is how we all feel Stewart,…because that’s what we all have just done.
In the absence of the Buckleys, Nick Cooke and Alan Shaw took on the role of Tweedle dum and Tweedle dee. Nick Cooke (Tweedle dum) told of his expertise in advising upon structural problems. Alan Shaw (Tweedle dee) told of a boundary wall he had recently seen that was leaning and cracked and a suitable candidate for Nick Cooke’s expertise. This really did not give him any time to indicate the sort of referrals he was looking for this week. My advice to Alan, for what it is worth, is that he should revert to the white rimmed glasses. They seem to up his performance in an Elton John-ish sort of way.
Kim Redwood-Lee could improve her 60 seconds simply by remembering to bring hers (glasses that is), her arms were not long enough to create the appropriate focal length to her notes but she was able to borrow a pair of glasses over which she glared in true school maamish style and we all immediately paid attention.
I note Richard Reed always likes a mention and this week his holiday offerings are more than worthy of headlines. For those of you who like an active holiday of stimulation of the body rather than “flop out” relaxation he recommended raunchy holidays in America, or was I dreaming! They sound great, but I will have to run it past the wife, Richard. As Kevin Brooks declared, Mrs Brooks is always right and as he declared this, 20 heads nodded sagely in agreement.
Fortunately Graham Thurston came late on in the 60 second round when everybody had finished their breakfast. He delivered a rather lurid account of the carpet of a Chinese Restaurant that apparently was unsuitable because of its luxuriant thickness that soaked up all spillages and created a rather soggy sensation when you walked on it. The answer of course was a gel back carpet that did not absorb the hoi sin or the sweet and sour sauces. I cannot help but feel that the problem is with the waiters rather than the type of carpet! It seems that attendance at the restaurant after the fitting of this gel backed floor covering would simply be a change of sensation; from a sort of boggy soggy sensation to the feeling that you are wading through oriental gunge.
Talking about feet, Peter Hood rushed is off his but is looking for small job, anything to do with taps apparently. I wonder what sort of things he could fit a tap to. I invite you in the comments section to make your suggestions and will kick it off with, “a tap on the head for water on the brain”. Ok, maybe I should not be perpetuating bad jokes but I have sort of taken the lead from John Probert. He alluded to the “why the long face” joke about a horse thereby prompting at least a further two animal jokes. I suppose if you must you can add any animal joke you like to the comments section below.
I cannot leave the 60 second round without mentioning Brian Painter’s pitch for anyone suffering from nerves. The performance that was really nerveless was Nick Morgan’s staccato style as he listed all the possible signs that he could produce. Totally unscripted it was a fantastic performance and he quite rightly was awarded the Oscar.
[EDIT BY SCOTT – I cannot leave the 60 second round without also including this rather fetching photo of Aidan wearing his “TM Law” hat. Or was it his “Quality HR” Hat?]
Paul Booth reported upon the Finance/Professions Synergy Team meeting which apparently was very stimulating although one of those in attendance apparently “dropped off” briefly…on two occasions. It really was a stimulating meeting, just not that stimulating. I will be attending the Business to Consumer Synergy Team meeting on Monday and I promise to be the model of alertness throughout Richard. Particularly if you start providing a few more details of these raunchy holidays in America.
The 10 minute presentation saw the most effective use so far of the new overhead projector when Jamie Harrison delivered a very professional presentation of precisely how Carmichael-Brown turns sunshine into pounds. It stimulated a lot of interest and hopefully will stimulate a lot of referrals. She did however at one stage of her presentation appear to be using semaphore or so the attached photograph seems to indicate.
Not only was the Meeting successful in so many ways but the Referrals and Testimonials round was excellent. £20,000 plus recorded business and 23 referrals.
It might well come as a blessed relief to you all to learn that I will be away for the next three Thursdays. Although I will miss you all I am looking forward to what might even turn out to be a raunchy holiday in the South West of France.
Aidan, I think that rather than using Semaphore to deliver her presentation, Jaimie is actually demonstrating some of her skills mentioned on her biography sheet, and doing a bit of Madonna “Vogue”!
Brilliant meeting. I think Jaimie’s presentation was absolutely eloquent, concise and interesting. So much so that I already have a referral for her.
See you all next week…I look forward to doing an ed slot soon, I have an idea I’d like to shae.
J
Great meeting as always and a good 10 minutes from Jamie and Peter H enjoyed himself on the door he wants to do it again next week with Marcelle. See you all next Thursday.
Possibly going to regret doing this, but here is another entry in the “Animal walks into a bar” series that we started…
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink, and while he’s drinking, the monkey jumps all over the place, eating everything behind the bar. Then the monkey jumps on to the pool table and swallows a billiard ball.
The bartender screams at the guy, “Your monkey just ate the cue ball off my pool table — whole!”
“Sorry,” replied the guy. “He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. I’ll pay for everything.”
The man finishes his drink, pays and leaves.
Two weeks later, he’s in the bar with his pet monkey, again. He orders a drink, and the monkey starts running around the bar. The monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his ass, pulls it out and eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. “Did you see what your monkey did now?” he asks.
“Yeah,” replies the guy. “He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures stuff first.”
Where to start, where to start… so much to comment on.. Aidan, it was RANCH HOLIDAYS!! Paul, failed miserably as a David Plumley impersonator – where were the really bad jokes? Nick Morgan, what is it you do again? Stewart, fantastic as ever mate. Jason, oh so embarassed. Marcelle, and her perfectly matched pair. Nick Cooke, I have a referal for you (Alan has the details). Kevin B., all of us long married men know exactly what you mean. As for Aidan & the hats… the first made him look like an American tourist… the second like an oversized school boy. Apologies to those not mentioned but I felt that I was going on a bit too much. Finally though a serious point, Jamie congratulations on a very professional & informative presentation. Great meeting everyone “go forth and prosper” (thats prosper Aidan).
Looks like I missed an excellent meeting. But of course it is all your fault that I was not there … as the job I’ve been doing came through you good folks at EBF
Looking forward to next week when I will arrive more relaxed.
… oh, and sincere apologies at missing Jaimie’s presentation. Can you do it again next week Jaimie?
A fantastic presentation by Jamie and a well deserved Oscar for Nick.
See you all next week.
Absolutely David! This week I will be doing the hokey-cokey.
Thank you all for such positive comments and look forward to seeing you this week.