A chilly morning produced a reasonable turnout of 20 members, which number could almost be increased to 21 as Paul Booth appeared via Skype during the 10 minute presentation from a deck chair somewhere in Tenerife (sad). On many levels this meeting was exceptional. The aforementioned appearance of Paul Booth being one of the levels.
Delivered by Mike Rogers this was also in many respects exceptional. He talked of Stalwarts or just Warts being the difference between those who have been with EBF for a long time and those who have been and gone in the flicker of an eyelid.
This flippantish start led to a very good analysis of the benefits of being a member of EBF and the need to put in order to get out. Effectively his message was, either do it properly or don’t do it at all…excellent.
The 60 Second Round
The School of Whimsy was to the fore this week, which was just as well because the Naughty Table was severely depleted and there were definitely non naughty people sat around it.
First Whimsy to address the meeting was Nick Cooke, he started off with an acronym of his business name-NCAA. He suggested one or two businesses that could use a similar acronym including the Nigerian Civil Aviation Authority. This and many other august bodies were laid out before us but were distinguishable from the said Mr Cook’s company in that none of them did structural surveys or party wall agreements. Alan Shaw, consistent with the tradition of Whimsy was not willing to say precisely what he did but instead that he did drawings and sketches and was very busy. Even past clients apparently have the audacity to chase him up to get ….completion certificates. Finally, Brian Painter arose and was less Whimsical and more revolting. Premature death by smoking arises from; narrowing of arteries, fatty acid build-ups, problems with your extremities leading to gangrene and tar in your lungs……all this is before you even mention cancer. Perhaps on reflection, his was not a whimsical offering but it made us all say a little prayer of thanks that we had all finished our breakfast.
Terry Maylin and Kim-Redwood-Lee both had a similar theme; the receipt of a recommendation for a small job that turned into something far more substantial. Richard Reed also talked about a small victory. He has been apparently advertising in the Parish Magazine for seven to eight years and finally got a bite.
Stuart Smallcombe was clarity itself in how he deals with expanding businesses; if it’s expanding in the building he can put together areas of the building, this is easy. If it is a next door warehouse the use of fiber optics will do the job. If the premises are across the road from each other it needs to be wireless but nonetheless effective. Even the other side of town it can be dealt with by the internet. Clearly more than West End to Southend, the world is his oyster.
David Plumley proudly produced Data Sticks which looked like dog tags and one of the sayings of the week “encryption is the solution”.
The multi-tasking Mike Rogers thumbed through his diary and demonstrated why he had done nothing all week apart from Wednesday. Kevin Brooks applauded this although he would rather role his days of into one holiday.
John Hammond has been involved in making a secure mental institution more secure. I think it was already in Wales but if it wasn’t, it is there now… and secure.
Jo Eastwood’s recipe for keeping summer going is to drink lots of Rose and Gin.
It was Cathy Neat however who caught the adjudicators eye with her explanation of what she has going on at her premises.
Before Nick Cook rose to deliver his 10-minute presentation Terry Maylin in the Meeting Secretary’s report gave us the statistics for the day which you will find below.
This weeks statistics and points of note
Paul Booth, despite his virtual absence….. or rather virtual presence still leads the Performance League
£33,000 worth of business recorded
21 members present
10 minute presentation by Nick Cooke
Nick Cook resplendent in red and white hooped socks, rose to deliver with the use of technology, to wit his mobile phone, the story of his working life. Very useful and quotable declarations including “I’m no accountant” “I was a round peg in a square hole, quickly corrected to square peg in round hole”. He has done lots of interesting things including redesigning piers in Gujarat which were suffering fatigue from the waves and the cantilevering a roof frame. All in all well delivered and confidence inspiring.