Chairman’s Business Networking Blog, Thursday 6th October 2016.
Another well attended and vibrant meeting. There were 21 members present and 2 guests; Nikhil Shah, a Dentist and Lewis Ward for the second time whose business is car leasing.
Tina Walker also showed her face at the beginning of the meeting and is threatening to come back next week.
All good meetings need good start. David Plumley obliged, producing an Ed Slot setting out “10 secrets” as to how you could waste your time at EBF. His delivery started out ironic and finished up sarcastic but it got the message over… that we need to turn up and pay attention when we are here.
Scott Griffiths was on a secret mission which was unfortunately unsuccessful; he returned and took the opportunity to infiltrate the Naughty Table instead. Terry Maylin stood in for him above the salt. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. The Naughty Table was accordingly depleted by the absence of Stuart Smallcombe who had been forced off the table and was obliged to sit on the next door table. He sort of sat sideways on and tried to infiltrate the Naughty Table. It was all very confusing…
You can normally rely on the School of Whimsy to provide a backdrop to the 60 second round that keeps you confused. This week Brian Painter of course was absent and the spotlight accordingly fell on Alan Shaw and Nick Cooke. Nick Cooke, rather boringly, had been involved with a residents committee meeting so there wasn’t much to be had from him; Alan Shaw on the other hand was a little more useful. An old client from years back had premises in Harwich and wanted some sort of conversion plans doing. That was pretty straight forward but everything from there started turning whimsical. He had been to a lecture at Anglia University on the fabric and structure of Churches and indeed Canterbury Cathedral. It sort of went on until after two minutes he sat down in confusion (for us, not him). Unfortunately at the moment there is not much call for the building of churches but………
What did emerge from the meeting however is a new candidate to join the Whimsies, namely the electric Mr Alan Moller. In his 60 seconds he talked about break ins and lights that will scare off burglars. Innocuous you might say but his claim to association with the Whimsies was really made in his 10 minute presentation. It is not normal that I mix up the 10 minutes presentation with the 60 second round but it is important for future Blogs what we get this straight. His 10 minute presentation spent a couple of minutes giving something of his background and how he got to where he is. He then turned to technology and having managed to plug in his laptop we were regaled with photographs from his holiday. We were given an insight into his summer motor bike journey round Europe. He managed such feats as parking his motor cycle in a hotel’s reception (“there was only a little bit of oil, from the chain, which I mopped up with a cloth”), he managed a spot of dogging whilst parking in what he thought was a secluded area and gave us the sort of guide that is very helpful to people like Richard Reed. Indeed it should have been a presentation by Richard Reed. I think we can all, after this 10 minute presentation, well and truly welcome Alan to the School of Whimsy…congratulations Al.
Right! Back to the 60 second round!
Donna was striking in her sun tan, Jo Jones was striking once again in being eminently quotable. Examples included “..we all love a prop..” and even better “..it’s not just about shakes..”
Dean Caldon not only was able to boast 12 sales on his books but also that he has a new apprentice. Apparently he is called “Jack”, we wish him well but must hope that under Dean’s tutelage he is able to avoid large men and climbing vegetables.
I happened to mention in my 60 seconds that I was happy doing the work that I do. This prompted Michael Adelizzi to confirm that he is also happy when people come in to his shop. Michael frequently describes his emporium and how it displays both bathroom and kitchenware; my own abiding impression, because I bought two from him, was that he has a very good line in king sized loos. I think we can safely christen these premises “the House of Thrones”.
David Plumley tried to frighten us. He spoke of disasters with regard to computers which apparently “ran somewhere”. It took me a little while to realise he was not alluding to the recent triumph of the British at the Olympics. It was only when he started talking about backups that I realised my mistake, “ransom ware”, of course.
Terry Maylin talked of a lady from Cobham. My challenge to you all is, in commenting on this Blog, that you produce a limerick that starts “There once was a lady from Cobham…”. The winner, to be judged by Terry Maylin, might receive a prize but it really won’t be worth anything other than the honour.
Jo Eastwood was flogging beers this week. One that gloried under the name of “Bloody Notorious” was 4.79% strength. She also has gluten free beer. Gluten free beer? I’ve seen the future!!
Whatever next, well, a realisation that Jo Eastwood was also awarding the Oscar and she awarded it to none other than Steve Roach. He gave us good news about his radio station but also that he had been photographed with a chicken. Apparently a new outlet of Nandos was advertising through the station and in order to qualify for a free meal he had to stand next to and be photographed with a chicken. Let’s hope they do not take on Anne Summers otherwise he might have to have his photograph taken with……here’s the second challenge for you in commenting on this Blog. Who or what might he be asked to be photographed with in such an instance?
Any further commentary on the 60 second round would be merely self-indulgent. So I will move on to other good news. The referrals and testimonials round revealed around £20,500.00 worth of business recorded and referrals hitting the 30 mark.
Another good effort by everybody and an excellent turnout, let’s hope we can repeat it again next week.
Excellent lively meeting and well done Scott for accepting the invitation to attend the other meeting… i look forward to hearing from you all with your limericks about the lady from Cobham….
Good meeting, see you all b and b later on this week!. Btw, can we bring the phrase “drop em” into the limerick?, just thinking ?
I even sat on the top table! I can’t cope with this level of confusion so early on a Thursday morning 🙂 An excellent 10 minute round by Alan, brilliant sparky and we’re lucky to have him. I’m afraid I won’t be at the meeting this week as I have a very sad family event to attend.
Have a good meeting everyone and see you next week.
There once was a lady from Cobham
Her doors she never did lock’m
Whilst soothing her troubles
In a bath full of bubbles
A neighbour caught sight of her bottom
Thanks for being so welcoming to Nikhil. I also won’t be at this week’s meeting as I’m on ‘Daddy Day Care’ duties
Great meeting folks as always but I especially liked Alan’s 10 minutes this week spent promoting Mountain destination holidays, great with or without snow (I much prefer the later).
Terry, give the prize to Aidan I can’t be asked.
lively meeting all, Alan’s 10 minutes was an absolute classic. see you next week folks.
There was a young lady from Cobham
who one after one did smoke em
she knew she needed more decorum
So visited brian from the Essex business forum
she’s now cured cause he guarantees to restore em
I knew a young lady from Twickers once, but thats another story!
Whilst you were all having fun at EBF, I was sweltering on a sunbed sipping Pina Colladas with colourful umbrellas and admiring the scenery ( nudge, nudge, wink, wink,elbow, elbow know what I mean,guv?) I’ve returned to 582 emails, just 473 to go! Rather chilly here, you know.