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Chairman’s Blog Thursday 12th September 2013.
25 members present, a much improved turn out on previous weeks with apologies for absence for virtually all members not present.
Last month’s winner of the performance league was Nick Cooke who was duly presented with his certificate.
We had the very pleasant task of inducting a new member, Dean Caldon who takes up the sales and letting seat, welcome Dean. We look forward to a long and fruitful membership for you and us.
David Plumley delivered the Education Slot with his customary élan. His subject this week was the 10 minute slot and he produced a detailed run down of how to successfully deal with this “much coveted opportunity” to members. It was my 10 minutes this week, which I had already prepared, so it was a bit late for me to make any corrections…never mind.
Talking of scrubbing up well, Marcelle Saad mentioned a 180 carat diamond worth 35 million dollars, apparently it is about the size of a small egg. On a day when breakfast consisted of scrambled egg that was fairly hard, it was rather difficult to imagine.
Alan Shaw went missing last week. Apparently he was at a Birmingham Architects conference; have we found something that we would rather get up for at 5am in the morning. It did get me thinking…I wonder what a room full of architects looks like. Indeed what is the collective noun that would describe architects “a design of architects”? My challenge to you all dear readers this week is to think of collective nouns that might be suitable, not only for architects but for any of the pursuits of our well respected members.
Mike Rogers claimed that he had predicted an upturn in the housing market in September and went so far as to claim that this is what it had done… that’s housing without a “d”. Nick Cooke would benefit from a housing upturn. He declared that Alan Shaw designs them and he just makes sure they stand up. He then went on to describe the challenge that would confront him later in the day as he visited Jaywick. Some people have all the luck!
Peter Hood revealed some of his other talents, other than simple plumbing. He takes baths out, presumably with the consent of the owner but will also do associated work in putting them back. I would not have expected anything less.
However bright the proceedings had been up until then when Adrian Crosdale stood up and demonstrated how old and new LED candle bulbs perform it was illuminating. The older candle bulb had a familiar look to it if you had attended Ann Summers parties but the newer one is definitely brighter and well worth recommending. Jason Nortey stood up and requested that we “used” him rather than needed him and the same could probably have applied to Adrian’s light bulbs.
Dean Caldon gave us a brief explanation of the extent of his business which was useful as a first 60 seconds. It might well be that he will not be dragged down into the mire of inconsequential comment that we all enjoy so much. Ed Crocker led the way talking about a big crane, not one of those that is protected by the RSPB but an 8ft wide one with 32 gears and as many wheels. He apparently had the pleasure of driving this down an 8ft wide road somewhere on the South Coast. So this week Ed is looking for…
No description of the 60 second offerings would be complete without casting a glance at our Pilgrims progress, particularly with the Bard of Hadleigh and the Poet Laureate, John Probert being absent. He picked up on the holiday themes and talked about Jumbo Jets. He seemed to think that we would be shocked by the thought of a Jumbo Jet full of passengers crashing every day and he is probably right. Apparently that is the equivalent casualty rate to those who die one way or another from smoking. Such cheerful thoughts make you wonder whether, if we doubled the number of air travellers and smokers we would very effectively target the prospect of global overcrowding. Brian finished off with showing us all a photograph of somebody’s toes who had been badly affected by cancer, which convinced me that an extra Jumbo Jet’s crashing would probably be a better prospect.
Paul Booth explained how anybody could call themselves an accountant and gave us some tips as to how to spot a real one. It made me think that a useful marketing ploy might be for all of us to call ourselves accountants but simply pass the work to Paul when we receive introductions. On the question of tips, Danielle White presented the Redwood Clarke slot and provided us with a list of suggestions as to how we should deal with out raw data to make it more palatable for book keepers when presented to them,thus making their life easier, their clients life easier and generally keeping their book keeping bills down. Terry Maylin duly awarded her the Oscar for her top tips which for some reason caused a titter to run around the room.
A very lively 60 seconds which perhaps illustrates the difference between the well attended and badly attended meetings.
The Meeting Secretary’s report was about last week’s committee meeting and the drive for visitors that we are looking to initiate. This initiative will be called “New Member November… in October”. I do not think I need to elaborate upon this other than to say that we will in the next week or so be looking at the form this initiative will take, watch this space!
Paul Booth reported on a successful Professions Synergy Team Meeting which then led up to the 10 minutes presentation. That “much coveted slot” was occupied by me this week. I decided to move everybody down to the bottom of the room for two reasons; one to make sure everybody stretched their legs and stayed awake during the presentation and the other was to enable me to sit down and still be able to look everybody in the eye. I suspect it got no more interesting than that but I will be publishing my 10 minute offering as a separate Blog for those of you who might retain any interest whatsoever in employers restrictions on employees on termination of their contract.
So to the referrals and testimonials round. This also was very lively with good numbers. £13,500.00 worth of business passed which has us at just over £46,000.00 for the month so far, in only its second week. There were also lots of referrals which promises well, with 38 in all.
At the time of preparing this Blog I note there is already traffic over the email regarding suggestions for our Christmas Dinner Venue. It might be wise to avoid any of Ed Crocker’s suggestions. It was something of a shock to see him without his shorts on this week, a sign that Autumn has truly arrived.
All in all a very good meeting and I end it with a plea to all members, keep up the good attendance and let us have an equally well attended meeting next week.